journal entry

i am actually sitting on my porch this morning enjoying an early morning breeze that is actually cool. ahhhh, this will turn to 91 degrees by 9. yikes, can't one ever escape the alabama heat? this week, i have been too busy to blog. kids to school, all except for crunch who has been with me EVERY DAY of the summer and does not go to pre-school until after labor day. this is actually torturous for him and me alike. he is tired of me, the house, McDonald's play place, spiderman (if you can imagine that!) and is ready for some structure! i am too. i am NOT good at the full time stay at home, bake cookies, volunteer at school, clean the house, pay the bills, greet the children when they come home with the warm homemade treats, help with the homework, fix my hair in a beautiful beehive for my husband's arrival, spritz myself with chanel # 5, make sure the pot roast is just right, all sit down for dinner. oh, by the way, the kids NEVER fight, they are all squeaky from their baths, and in their matching underoos and house coats. then, because the house is immaculate, the kids are asleep at seven-thirty and my housework all finished...we retreat to the couch to catch an "everybody loves raymond" re-run. he reads the mail while i work on knitting the kids winter hats. we go to bed and what happens from there is not spoken of because we are in A BLACK AND WHITE 1950's TV SHOW!
breathe
OK, so life is NOT like this for us and i do not pretend that it is or should be. there is a big gap between our parents generation and ours. they have watched us eat on paper plates (the horror), my husband cook the meals (i hate to cook and am NO good at it), both of us help with the dishes, laundry, putting the kids to bed. both of us have been pooped on, peed on, vomited on, thus experiencing "parenthood". i am so blessed to have a husband that helps at home, in addition to "bringing home the bacon AND frying it up in a pan". i do have one thing to add, i ALSO work (although not as much as bert) i am MOM and ARTIST! my job begins about an hour or two after his job starts and really does not end until an hour or two after they go to sleep. i often think of single mothers and wonder HOW DO THEY DO IT?? there is a mom with three girls that i know, and she does it all! i am in awe of her. she is just one of the many.

my dad was odd. in a good way though. 36 years ago when i was born he was fully involved in taking care of me. the number one thing that i remember and was PRICELESS to me was the fact that he ALWAYS tucked me in bed. all of his girls (he has 4). those were PRECIOUS times. i will never forget the silly conversations we had and the giggling we would do. the secrets i would tell him. precious. i would tell every dad that i know to do this from the beginning. we have a bond and i think it started very young. some dads wait until their kids are old enough to "have a conversation" to engage in them. some never even change a diaper! bonding actually starts at the changing table, i say! eye to eye, cleaning up a nasty poop but thinking the little creature you are cleaning up is SO dependent on you for survival is... well, priceless. men that i know these days seem to participate MUCH earlier than most men our parents generation. i do not know one other dad that taught their daughters, sitting on the edge of the sink with shaving cream and a disposable razor, to shave their legs! hilarious! he also had no issues buying "feminine products" and he knew which ones to buy! hilarious. four girls can make a daddy do ANYTHING!
but, back to present day: i am tired, he is tired. we muttle through what we can. we eat, our kids are clothed, homework is done, we pass out in our beds at 9 and start all over again the next day. sound exciting? well, there are many happy times! we laugh, we play games, we go for ice cream, we love church. but life is not perfect. i never pretend it is. God gave us these three kiddo's. that is that! i just pray that we are doing a good job. but i have heard it said, "you have to give your children SOMETHING to go to counseling about!" hopefully it is nothing earth shattering! we are doing our best, we love the Lord, the kids, and each other. isn't that what it is all about?